Your one-stop shop for novelty betting

So which of these is more inevitable: The huge Hollywood biopic on Michael Jackson probably already the subject of dozens of pre-pre-pre-production meetings or Paddy Power bookmakers “making things interesting” by offering a cheeky novelty bet on the subject?

We’ll run though the Paddy’s posted possibilities on the prop momentarily, but prospective punters should first note that “Bets void should no movie about Michael Jackson’s life be released.” Yeah, like that’s gonna happen.

Prospective names for the untitled Michael Jackson project, according to Paddy Power, include:

Michael (4/1) – It’s good and short, that’s for sure. Paddy didn’t post a line on “M.J.” as a possible title, perhaps as the initials are now trademarked by Michael Jordan. Are the Hollywood people sure His Airness doesn’t own all rights to use of the name “Michael”?

Invincible (8/1) – Come on, this sounds like a depressed superhero flick starring Will Smith. Or Bruce Willis. Or Ben Stiller. Next!

Thriller (9/1) – Possible, but can’t you imagine the Michael Jackson estate suing itself for rights on a title belonging to the biggest-selling album ever?

You are not Alone, Leave Me Alone (both 10/1) – If they go the horror route, maybe. Or if they run with the creepy pedophile angle.

Bad (12/1) – Good title for a serious movie. Here are some more good ones: “Flop,” “Bomb,” and “Unwatchable.”

Don’t Stop ‘til You Get Enough (16/1) – Nah.

Prince of Pop (16/1) – But I thought Michael was the “King of Pop.” If he’s the prince, who’s the king? Maybe Prince is the King of Pop … whoa.

Man in the Mirror (16/1) – At 16/1? This may be the pick of the litter here. It’s an autobiographical song, so it could easily serve as intro song and/or plot device and/or jumping-off point for the film itself.

Black or White (50/1) – (Restraining self … too easy to make joke … restraining self…)

Beat It (66/1) – And Eddie Van Halen’s gonna do a cameo as Steven Spielberg, right?

PYT (66/1) – Yeah, this is what you want: Thorough contemplation of the lyrics to this song by movie-going audiences. Maybe they could do it like “Immortal Beloved,” and have the screenwriter speculate as to the intended subject of the song. My money is definitely not on Priscilla Presley.

The Lost Children (100/1) – I dare you, Hollywood. I double dare you.